Another day, another almost missed post. Except.. today it’s less silly and rambly and more melancholy.
I don’t even know, you guys. See.. I’ve got my mental illnesses under control. I’m on medication and I’ve had the CBT and I overcame it. But today I’ve felt .. just shit. I’m writing this right now and my brain’s telling me not to bother, “they’ve all heard it before, they don’t want to hear your whining.” Usually I’m able to catch these thoughts in mid-air and just waft them away like smoke in the air, but for some reason, today I don’t seem to have the strength. These thoughts are more like raindrops. You can tell the rain to go away all you want, but you don’t control the weather it just.. is.
So while my brain is over here throwing around words like “annoying, boring, fat, useless, slow, clingy” (you get the point), I’ll just get under cover from the rain and hope it stops soon, while reminding myself of what my counsellor said to me back in October 2014. “Would you say these things to a friend?”
I think I need to just spend some time enjoying my games, cuddling my husband, and getting out. You know? Oh by the way, I actually kinda love rain. I think it’s beautiful.
Anyway, I hope you guys are having a better hump day. *hugs* for you all. 🙂 I’m sure I’ll be back to normal shortly.
In actual happy news, I commissioned a new chibi of Jaedia (my avatar “me”) and it shouldn’t be much longer now! The mock-up looks amazing, I can’t wait.